Polish cinemas offer currently two movies about single life. Even though I have stopped watching romantic comedies long time ago (more or less at the time when I realized that and they lived happily ever after usually means and they lived till a divorce trying to survive somehow) being interested in life of single people, I watched both of the movies. They did not enchant me, they were good representatives of the genre and both went even a bit beyond that.
Polish movie “Single planet” has many surprisingly funny situations simultaneously with overwhelmingly embarrassing situations (typical for this kind of movies). Main heroine in this movie has an opportunity to get to know ups and downs of dating websites. Well, in her case mostly downs. She met a specter of bizarre men, and the date went for weird to weirder. Judging by her experience I would avoid dating websites like the plague. Why bother to waste your time for pointless dates, giving nothing more than a headache and a feeling of complete disaster. What is more, the movie does not mention the fact that only a few percent of the online conversations lead to a real life meeting. And usually not because She and He after long, in-depth discussion decided that it is not match made in heaven. Usually, the reason is more disturbing: one of the interlocutors has never actually wanted or was ready for the tête-à-tête. It may be because of some traumatic relationship experience from the past, or of the simple fact that in the next room there is a husband/a wife and online flirt is something else than a real date. I was once told a story of a guy who was happy in only 80%. He had a wife, children and a job. He was looking for this missing 20% on a dating website. The girl who told me the story was not interested in fulfilling happiness of him, but maybe he had found somebody who was, or he stopped telling the truth. Entering the online dating world means that you have to prepare yourself for the fact that most of the acquaintances will not go further than a few messages, some will end after first face-to-face meeting, but maybe there will be this one which will last a bit longer.
My personal experience with a dating site is very short and very positive. I can honestly say veni, vidi, vici. From the day when I completed my profile to the day when I met the guy I am in relationship now was less than a week. I was extremely lucky, but I am proud of myself that I avoided full shelf trap. When I told my friends, that happily I met someone I like at the very beginning, they told me: come on; go on some more dates, maybe you will meet somebody more interesting. Dating website with their endless users may create an impression that there is always somebody better. So try to think other way, what if I met this girl I like in a café? Would I go next day to the same café hoping to meet another girl? Or rather would I focus on better knowing this one? I was wise enough not to listen to the advice.
M. was not that lucky, as I was. He had to date a little bit before he found me ;). And somewhere in-between of more or less depressing dates he thought of creating I am SGL Community; the community of people who are open to getting to know new people and not necessarily on stressful dates, when it is hard not to look too despaired, but in the comfort of relaxed meeting at a coffee or bear. The idea that you can meet somebody who can potentially be your partner without painful dates is very appealing. And worse can happen is that instead of meeting a partner I will gain some new friends. Not that bad.
Currently we organize every Tuesday weekly meetings in Warsaw (I am SGL Warsaw – FB). You can come by, talk, stay longer or leave after a while. No pressure, no necessity to advertise yourself. Just simply meeting of open people.